Bridal Show & Wedding Fair

I was so excited to attend this Bridal Show & Wedding Fair nang Centara Grand Mirage Beach Resort last two weeks ago. However, it was a major epic fail. LOL. Natawa na lang kami ni nana sa experience na yun. Here's what happened...

After lunch nang sunday, August 12, we left the house. Dala namin yung lunch ni nano. Dumaan muna kami sa office niya sa City Garden Condominiums para ihatid yung food. After, we went to the venue na. Excited pa kami nun!

It was a short drive from the city center. Doon kasi siya sa area nang mga luxury hotels and resorts. Nakapunta na doon si nana dati for a wedding nang co-singer niya pero hindi lang niya matandaan na eksakto yung daan. Kaya hinanap pa namin. Nag-dora the explorer mode pa kami. Buti na lang may GPS yung sasakyan, at may internet service ang blackberry phone, natulungan kaming mahanap yung lugar. The power of technology!

Pagdating sa resort, I was in awe. Ang ganda ganda nang place. 5 star hotel nga. Pagka-park, hinanap na agad namin yung exact location nang event. Inisip pa namin baka ma-late na kami. So pagdating doon, nakita na namin yung set-up, kaso, tapos na pala. Haha! In-effort pa namin hanapin yung lugar, ready na ang mga business cards ko, handa na akong makipaghalubilo, hinatak ko pa si buntis sa lakad na yun dahil baka swerte siya sa akin, wala pala kaming madadatnan. Major LOL for the day yun.

Ang ending balance? I took pictures of the place na lang para ma-blog at ma-share ko yung ganda nang place to everyone. Umuwi na kami after. Natawa na lang kami sa sasakyan. Panay kasi imagine kami nang mga free taste nang cakes at iba ibang food while on our way, na-jinx tuloy. Hehe. Di bale, wala mang bridal show and wedding fair na naabutan, nasilayan ko naman ang ganda nang Centara. Someday, babalik ako doon, kasama na si hubbee at ang mga kaibigan ko dito, magche-check-in kami!

Dating Theory

A friend from twitter asked for some advice about a guy he likes that he's now dating and he wants to be serious this time. We had a good discussion about different things. We also had a conversation about intimacy and I asked him to read the entry I made about it (Intimacy without Sex).  And from there, I shared also some dating theories I know based from experience and some information from friends.

Before kasi, I really sometimes look at relationship as just an emotional cage, that sad couples peek from behind the bars of, looking at all as happy single people wondering what fear of being alone made them say "I do". I love ROMANCE as compared to my love with RELATIONSHIPS before. Romance gives joy and happiness to me. Relationships gives pain and sorrow. Kaya sawain talaga ako dati.

Of course, that was my paradigm. People see and view things differently naman. And that was mine. But don't get me wrong. I'm not anti-relationship. I'm just stating a piece that I have enjoyed "Romance" so much as I have enjoyed Relationships. In terms of dating, just like my other friend, 5 dates happens to be the perfect amount of time to achieve maximum fun with no pain, no expectation equals no disappointment. It's just fun and no rules.

And as they say, after the 5 dates, it's where all the new chapter starts. It's either the start of a new happiness or a start of a new worse nightmare. Hehe. I don't wanna claim that I have dated a lot so I'll just say, I have dated a few. LOL. And most of those few dates were fun. Why? Because there's no strings attached. It was a care-free, hassle-free without thinking what would be the next. You just enjoy the time and the person you are with.

But yes, there were dates that sucked! Guys that were boring, air-headed, sexually aggressive, illogical, overly romantic. Waah!!! May mga naalala na naman ako. LOL. Okay, no naming of names. I'm glad tapos na ako sa dating-dating stage. Nahanap ko na ang para sa akin, in which we had a different and unique story not applicable to this dating theory. So anyways, let me share this theory that might help you in dating your prospect.

1st Date

First date is the new beginning. It's where all the anticipations happens. It's where the great introduction starts. The first impressions that may or may not last. It's where the fake smile and laughter shows up, the movements and gestures are refined, it's where you are fully conscious about everything that happens between the two of you. You should really be good on your first date. It's the make or break part of everything...

2nd Date

Second Date should be theatrical or cultural. You can take your date in a museum, go watch a movie, a concert, a stage play. This date is the "planned date". Unlike the first date, it's not so grand as it is the typical set-up. This is where the exchange of background information happens. And of course, the first kiss can start to happen on the 2nd date. I guess it's important to know if your date is a good kisser.

3rd Date

Third Date should be an adventure. Something out of the norm. Go for a road trip. Bunjee Jumping. Jet Skiing. River Rafting. Scuba Diving. Paintball Shooting. Race Car. Or Karaoke can be considered an adventure especially when you're date is afraid to belt some songs in public. Bring your date somewhere that will make you discover the other side of his/her personality. Pag adventure kasi, mas lumalabas minsan yung mga tinatago nilang kilos on a normal date. This is also the part where you can give a glimpse of the other side of you too...

4th Date

Fourth date should be the time where you invite him/her in your place (if you have your own). This time, cook something where you can brag about and have a simple yet romantic dinner at your dining table. It's going to be comfortable as it will be just the two of you, no disturbance from other people, and it will bring out the full personality of your date. This is the best time to show your sanctuary to your date, what you have in your place, what you keep, photo albums, the music you listen to, the books you read, etc. But NO SEX muna ha!

5th Date

Fifth Date, as the last date for the "5 Date Theory" should be the time you enjoy sex. Yes. I said SEX!!! It's where you feel the passion in him/her towards you and feel his/her naked glory. This is where you get to know if he/she is good in bed, or if he/she sucks. At this point, you are already very comfortable with each other. You know a little about the person, you have laughed about things already. But it should be spontaneous. You don't push sex to happen.

Enjoying the last of all dates, after going to places, doing stuff, eating food, knowing everything, the kissing and sex, this is where you decide whether you would like to keep your date and go to the next level, or stop from there, leave, forget and move on. This 5 Date Theory is designed to fully enjoy the art of dating. A perfect time to get to know more of your date towards some possibilities in the future. Kaya please, wag munang mag-I Love You-han sa mga unang dates. Natuwa lang minsan kasi, may I love you na agad.

Dating for me is the stage of getting to know someone. Not a phase where you need to go through so you can jump in to bed and have sex, or jump in to a relationship so quickly. Yan, madami niyan ngayon. That's why there are a lot of broken hearts today. They have been captured by their fantasies and never thought of the things that can happen when you let your emotions decide in getting in to relationships.

Dating is fun. It should be. Although disappointments, frustration, shocking revelations, crazy things should be expected. Not all dates are good. As I have said, there are dates that sucks!!! So if you plan to have some date, you may try this theory. Who knows, it might work. If it doesn't, don't blame me. LOL. But my friend got very interested to know this dating theory. I hope it works for him and to the guy he likes.

Photowalk: Pattaya's Wax Works

Love For Photography

It was year 2009 when I first had my digital SLR. Ang saya saya ko noon. Kasi nabili ko yung gusto kong Nikon D3000 na camera galing sa pinaghirapan kong pera. Isa yun sa mga binalak kong bilhin at nabili ko nga siya. Kasagsagan pa noon nang DSLR sa Pilipinas. Parang naging fad yung magkaroon nang malaking camera at i-phase out ang mga compact digital camera.

At that time, gusto ko kasi matuto nang photography. Gusto ko mag-aral nang photography. Gusto kong maging magaling sa photography. I was really that interested about photography for some reason. Naa-amaze ako. And normally, when I want something, I work hard to achieve it. I really push myself.

But due to many unexpected circumstances, sa lahat nang mga gusto ko na yun, ang natupad lang eh magkaroon nang camera for photography. LOL. Di na natuloy ang balak kong pag-aaral. Pero, sinubukan ko pa din matuto on my own. Self study. Experiment and explore. Sabi ko sa sarili ko, I will learn on my own. I want to challenge myself if I have a given talent on photography by not looking at any website or learning from any expert. Test lang. Kasi pag wala, I'll stop. Pero feeling ko that time, parang meron. And so I tried.

Luckily at that time, I had a team who's willing to be part of my initial test shots. Part of that one month's engagement activity that my R&R Team launched was a photo shoot that's done every week. We divided the team into four groups, one will have a representative model on the week's theme competing for a prize. The Rewards & Recreation Team at that time was formed by the Cheequitas (Ash, Hazel & Drey) and called the contest as "Make Me The Next Fashionista". You can check out our very amateurish and fun activity at youtube (click this LINK).

First week's theme was Zodiac Signs. The first week became a learning experience for the R&R Team kasi gumamit lang kami kung ano makita namin for props. Lumang kumot, basurahan, cartolinas, tapos wala din namang professional make-up artists sa team so talagang pure na engagement and recreation activity lang namin. Katuwaan lang na game lahat. Kaya the following weeks, nag-iimprove siya unti unti. Second week's theme was Season, Elements for the third week, and Movie-inspired theme for the last week. And still, I was experimenting on my shots.

What's funny was, meron akong ahente na di nagme-make up pero napapayag namin. Meron din akong 50 years old na, pero napapayag namin. Meron din akong di game sa mga ganung kaartehan at pagbihis-bihis, pero napapayag namin. Meron din akong straight guys, napapayag din namin. Meron din akong sobrang mahiyain at di mahilig sa pictures, napapayag namin. Meron namang mga game na game. Meron pa ngang nagpa-parlor as preparation for the shoot. Ganun kasaya ang team ko sa mga ganun. Kaya ayun, opportunity for me to test if I have some skills in photography.

That's where it all started. I decided to continue learning the craft. I know that it will take time, will take a lot of test shots, to be good with it. Hanggang sa unti unti na akong natututo. Kakapanood ko nang America's Next Top Model, observe observe lang. Pero hindi pa din ako nage-explore sa  internet. Hindi pa din ako bumibisita sa mga photography sites. Kasi alam ko naman sa sarili kong hindi ko ito magiging profession. Hobby lang talaga that somehow I got passionate about. At ayoko ding sabihing may ginayahan ako. Gusto ko, magkaroon man, alam ko sa sarili ko na hindi.

DISCLAIMER: I never claimed I'm good at it. Natuwa at na-enjoy ko lang siya kaya nagtuloy-tuloy na ang interest ko sa photography. Up to now, I'm still not a professional photographer and still not claiming I'm good at it. Malayo pa ako sa pwedeng tawaging "magaling". Hindi rin kasi pa ako nag-iinvest sa gamit. But I believe that I got aligned in to creative photography. Kasi I enjoy playing with the shots thru post production (editing). In creative photography kasi, it doesn't end from having a good camera and your shots.

Some raw shots needs enhancements. Minsan kailangan i-rotate pag medyo tabingi, kailangan ayusin yung exposure nung light kung madilim o masyadong maliwanag, alisin yung agaw atensyon na blemishes na sumasapaw sa subject nang shot, i-balance yung kulay, i-highlight yung gusto mong subject, at kung ano ano pa. So aside from taking pictures, na-enjoy ko talaga ang post production. Dahil sabi nga nila, it takes creativity to do it. At sabi din nila, some are born to take good shots but not in editing. So I'm exploring in to those two and challenging myself.

Although I don't use Adobe or Photoshop kasi di ako marunong nun. I just use some free enhancement tools online, laro-laro, mix-mix, explore lang, again, another way of challenging myself to be good at something I'm not an expert of by using non-professional materials. Gusto ko kasing maging storya ko sa photography eh someone who had inner talent, had that playful creativity, and passion that moved him to grow in his craft and be good at it. So that's the journey I'm taking in photography.

Kaya when there's an event. I take some shots. I like to capture moments especially when my subject is people. Kaya in any occasion or just simpleng tambay, basta dala ko ang camera ko, lagi akong si picture. Pag na-byahe naman, lagi kong ginagawang model si hubbee. To capture the view and the memories of our journey. But I also take photographic shots along the way. Lagi nakalabas yung camera ko. At nahihilig ako ngayon sa photo walk. Random shots. So you see, it's just plain hobby I truly enjoy. A plain love for photography!

Feel free to like my Facebook page by clicking the link at the right side of my blog or the image above. Title is Photography by Alexander James. Mga sample shots lang yun. So please do not expect too much ha. Inayos ko kasi yung page nung isang araw, may gusto daw tumingin na possible client. Napa-wow na lang ako. Kaya pinagpuyatan kong ayusin at i-update uli. Kaya hanggang di gumi-give up sa akin ang camera ko, itutuloy ko itong masayang hobby. Nakakatanggal stress siya sa akin. Nare-relax ako.

I will soon launch my Travelography here in my blog. I will share some shots I've taken during my travels in the Philippines. Part of promoting our country na din.

Top 20 Signs

Just to entertain your monday, let me share this Top 20 signs that you're watching a Pinoy movie. This is for all the pinoys out there! I'm sure everyone can relate to it..

1. Sasayaw sa likod nang puno ng buko pag nasa beach yung scene. Alternate pa yung mga ulo nila.

2. Yung kontrabida yayakap sa bida, sabay taas nang kilay at ngingisi.

3. Uuwi ang bida na may dalang pancit sa kanyang nanay na si Anita Linda. Tatawagin nito ang mga bata para kumain, at kakamustahin nang bida ang pag-aaral habang kumakain nang pancit. Biglang may titigil na sasakyan sa harap nang bahay at pauulanan nang baril ang pamilya! Mamamatay si Anita Linda, at sisigaw ang bida ng "Inaaay!" at mangangakong ipaghihiganti ito. Moral lesson: Ang pansit nagdadala ng malas - nakakamatay.

4. Pag may magkaribal na babae, yung mabait deretcho ang buhok at may bangs. Yung salbahe, laging kulot.

5. Sa pinoy action movies, ang bida hindi nauubusan nang bala.

6. Sa pinoy action movies, kapag tumakbo ang bida, sa lupa lahat ang tama ng bala nang kalaban.

7. Kapag may angry mob na pupunta sa bahay-kubo ng manananggal, si Vangie Labalan ang laging lider.

8. Alam mong moment of truth na nang bida kapag sinabi na niya yung title nang pelikula.

9. Ang tawag nang kontrabida sa mga goons niya, "Mga bata."

10. Yung nakababatang kapatid nang bida habang naglalaro nang bola, mabibitawan at mapupunta sa gitna nang kalsada. Tapos may darating na sasakyan, tapos itutulak siya nang bida. Yung bida naman ang nasa gita nang kalsada. Biglang may sasakyang darating. Ang bida, ico-cross lang niya arms niya covering his face tapos sisigaw yung kapatid nang 'kuyaaa!'. Next scene nasa ospital na sila. Simula na nang drama.

11. Kapag bakbakan, hindi nasasaktan ang bida, pero umaaray siya pag ginagamot na siya nang leading lady, at kasunod na ang love scene.

12. Kapag sinabi nang kontrabida ang masama niyang plano sa bida, ang sasabihin nang bida: "hayop ka!".

13. Ang bidang babae, pag katulong ang role, siguradong magiging anak nang amo niya sa ending.

14. Ang nanay nang mayaman laging may pamaypay na pangmayaman, at ang nanay nang mahirap laging naka duster.

15. Ang hideout nang kontrabida, parating mansion na may chicks sa pool.

16. Ang mga bida sa drama, pag nakatanggap nang masamang balita, laging may pinto sa likod nila para puwede silang sumandal habang nagi-slide dahan-dahan pababa, tapos todo iyak with matching uhog.

17. Pag di nahuli nang mga goons ang bida, sasabihin nang boss sa kanila, "Mga inutil!".

18. Laging nakakapulot nang baril na may bala ang bida kapag kinakailangan niya.

19. Laging mas maganda ang yayang bida kesa sa kontrabidang anak nang amo niya.

20. Pag ang ending nang movie ay song and dance number sa beach o resort, ang huling frame, tatalon ang buong cast... > sabay freeze

Aminin mo, um-agree ka at least sa ilan diyan. Haha!

The Laundry Job Part II

Paglipat dito sa bagong bahay, laking pasasalamat ko na may kasama nang washing machine. Fully furnished na kasi itong house. Halos isang buwan din akong nagmanual laba dun sa apartment dahil ayoko ngang magpa-service sa laundry shop dito. Remember my post about The Laundry Job? Oh well, life in Thailand! Life without hubbee. I must do everything on my own. That's what life taught me here. But good thing that technology is helping me survive this laundry thing. This machine has helped my life to get better.

I officially declare today that I now love Washing Machines. LOL.

Last night, while doing my laundry, I got curious on how this machine works. Na-amaze kasi ako kung paano niya napa-puti yung maduming puting twalya the last time. As in pulidong puti. Kaya sabi ko, sige nga, let me see how this machine does it. So binuksan ko lang yung cover, automatic na kasi siya. Ilalagay mo lang yung mga damit mo, lagay din nang powder sa isang tab, press start and it will do the work na. Ang gagawin mo na lang is magsasampay pag natapos na.

I was observing how it works. The whole washing process, na-observe ko. Inorasan ko pa. Until kailangan nang mag-spin dahil na-drain na yung water na may sabon. But after, it stopped. And I was just staring at it. Trying to figure out why it's not continuing. Inisip ko pa baka may counting yung machine or something. Mga ilang minutes din yun. Until na-realize ko it won't spin hanggang bukas yung cover. Haha. So sinara ko, then it continued. Tanga lang. Haha! Ganyan talaga pag walang exposure sa washing machine. LOL.

Sayang, di ko na-observe kung paano niri-rinse at inii-spin yung mga damit. Kainis. Magpapabibo sana ako sa blog entry na ito, wala din. In short, I just want to share an experience lang pala. Haha. Now, mae-enjoy ko na ang paglalaba ngayon. Kasi effortless na siya. Yahoo! Now this is what I call The Laundry Job - the easy version. Hehe. Kapag andito na si hubbee, hindi na rin siya mahihirapan. Magiging masayang asawa na siya. LOL.

When I Born, I Black

When I born, I black

When I grow up, I black

When I go in Sun, I black

When I scared, I black

When I sick, I black

And when I die, I still black

And you white fellow

When you born, you pink

When you grow up, you white

When you go in Sun, you red

When you cold, you blue

When you scared, you yellow

When you sick, you green

And when you die, you gray

And you calling me colored?

This poem was nominated by the United Nations (UN) as the best poem of 2006. It was written by an African child. Simple but brilliant masterpiece!

Food Discoveries Part III

Every month, I feature some of the food I discover here in Pattaya. Food that either I haven't seen one in the Philippines, I haven't tried, or it existed in the Philippines but I only got a chance to try it here in Pattaya. For the previous posts, you may click the link below.

Food discoveries Part I

Food Discoveries Part II

I am again posting a few discoveries. The thai version of Cream Puff, Burger King's Vanilla Ice Cream with Pineapple, Puffie Young Cococnut Pie, Jalapeno Poppers and DQ Ice Cream with Sweet Corn.

1. Cream Puff. I had a chance to try the thai version of cream puff. I must say, mas masarap pa rin yung cream puffs na natikman ko sa Pilipinas. So far ha. I'm sure meron ding masarap na thai version somewhere, di ko pa lang nadi-discover. But the one I tried, so so lang. Mas matamis ang cream sa atin.

2. Vanilla Ice Cream with Pineapple. Alam niyo namang mahilig ako sa ice cream. Hindi kumpleto ang burger meal pag kumakain sa Burger King kung walang ice cream for dessert. So they have the regular chocolate and strawberry flavor katulad sa atin sa Pilipinas, but they also have this pineapple flavor. Parang crushed pineapple bits on top of your vanila ice cream. So so lang din ang lasa.

3. Young Coconut Pie. Para lang din siyang buko pie pero naka roll yung pie tapos inside is the coconut. Matamis nang kaunti. Parang peach-mango pie nang Jollibbee. Ganun yung konsepto. Tamang pang-midnight snack. Nabili ko siya sa Family Mart nung gabing nagutom ako habang naghihintay nang sundo for my exit sa Cambodia.

4. Jalapeno Poppers. Eto sure akong meron nito sa Pilipinas. But I haven't tried one there. Dito ko siya natikman. Si nana ang umorder. Ang sarap. Ang rich nung cream cheese inside tapos di masyado maanghang. I won't mind ordering another one pag kumain kami uli doon sa restaurant malapit sa apartment ni Ray. I just forgot the name of the restaurant.

5. Vanilla Ice Cream with Sweet Corn. After the vanila ice cream na may pineapple bits on top, tinry ko naman itong bagong labas nang Dairy Queen (DQ) na vanilla ice cream with sweet corn on top. Andaming naiimbentong toppings dito. Haha. Masarap din siya. Pero I still prefer the usual toppings nang DQ ice cream.

Live Up To 100 Years

I'm afraid of death. So as I am afraid of getting old. Remember my post about Getting Old (click the link). If only there's a way to get out of it, I would do it. But that's life. Everyone will actually grow old. And eventually, everyone will die. Sucks right? If only there's an exception to the rule. So I guess my only option is to live long and enjoy life. How to do it? Let me share this surprising tips on how you can live up to 100 years of age.

Now, let's check the list...

DRINK GREEN TEA . Does this include the C2 green tea? Haha. I'm not a fan of drinking hot tea, like Chinese do. But I think my dad was right when he kept on citing them as an example for longer life when I was a child. Tea is like their water. Like English men too. I just don't like the taste but I guess, if I want to live long, I have to start trying.

BE OUTGOING . Okay, check na ako dito. If it means going out and traveling, no additional comment on this. Haha. EAT NUTS. I often eat nuts. I guess only when there's an available one. But I make sure I include this on our grocery list. I enjoy eating nuts after reading many good things about the benefits it gives to people.

FLOSS . I never imagined flossing will make you live long. Haha. It was a revelation at first seeing it on the list but after reading the explanation, I kinda understood why it was included. DO NOT SMOKE. Another check for me. I don't smoke and never smoked and will never try to smoke. Especially when I had a chance to see how the nicotine looks like once you finished one stick. The thought of it staying and getting stuck inside your body, ulk! No!

EMBRACE NEW TECHNOLOGY . Well I did. Not just embrace, super duper embrace pa. I think I'm socially engaged enough. Facebook, Twitter and this blog makes me embrace the new world trend. HAVE A BABY LATER IN LIFE. No comment. Damn! Pwede na ba yung partner as baby? Haha. TAKE MORE HOLIDAYS. Oh yes! Will surely do. Kung pwede nga lang palaging holiday, why not. The best feeling talaga yung magte-take ka nang break from work and looking forward to a vacation or travel. Nakaka-high!

LIE IN. Toink! Fine. This I have to really deal with. I've got to really have a better way of making sure I get enough rest in a day. I think that's one of the reasons why I got sick was because of lack of sleep. Hirap lang talaga ako. Kung meron nga lang button to press para makatulog agad. But yeah, I'm on it. DRINK A LITTLE WINE. What!! I'm not a fan of wines. For some reason, I hate the taste of wine. Oh no, how is that! I better find the wine that will suit my taste. Will put that on my to-do list. Any suggestions?

And lastly, LAUGH. Oh! I love to laugh. But only with the company of good friends (and not alone, that's different, haha). I'm very serious at work. But when I'm bugged by my friends for a little chat, we never fail to laugh around. I love to laugh. I have my way of being happy so I don't forget this. Buti na lang, may Nana at Ray ako dito sa Pattaya, mga supplier ko nang katatawanan. Hehe. I'm a believer of the saying that laughter is the best medicine so take it everyday.

Oh, I'm done with my checklist. It's your turn!!!

Happy Chapter XXXV

Happy Chapter XXXV hubbee!

35 months na. Isang buwan na lang, anniversary na natin. Ang bilis nang panahon. Parang kailan lang. Excited na ako! Di lang ako masaya, masayang masaya pa. Dahil sino bang mag-aakala na tatagal tayo nang ganito. Hindi ko inasahan, I'm sure di mo din inasahan. Lagi kita tinatanong dati noon, kung tatagal ba tayo. Naiinis pa ako sa sagot mo, dahil palaging "hindi ko alam". Pero lagi mong sinasabi na, "Mackee, mahirap mangako, pero pag nagmahal ako, gusto ko pangmatagalan"

Unti unti na tayong nakaka-adjust sa long distance relationship. Although andiyan pa din ang hirap at lungkot, yung pagka-miss sa isa't isa, yung feeling na napilay tayo dahil wala na yung isa sa tabi, pero unti unti na nating naitatakbo yung buhay natin na malayo sa isa't isa. Thankful ako kasi sa awa nang Diyos, nakakayanan natin. Thank you for having that strong faith in God, and for the faith in our relationship. Thanks for your prayers.

Pagdating nang tamang oras, nang araw, nang panahon, alam kong makakasunod ka na dito, magkakasama na uli tayo. Siguro kinailangan natin itong time away from each other so we can spend time with ourselves. So we can miss each other so much and value a lot of things which we oversee before nung araw araw tayong magkasama. I can't wait for the day na magkatabi na uli tayo matulog. Soon, that special day will come. Just hang on. Kaya natin ito!

Relationship Roles

It's 9:00 pm here in Pattaya. A few hours to go, I'm about to greet hubbee for our monthsary. With that simple thought, I got inspired in writing about relationship roles. Tinopak lang. Hehe.

In a relationship, to make it work, each of you must have a defined role. It is very important. In order to do that, both of you must identify each strength and weakness to make it more effective. Once you have identified what you can do good, and what you lack or not capable of doing, get in to an agreement and stay committed to what have been agreed upon.

In my relationship with hubbee, that arrangement worked. It made things easy for us. Less conflicts, less arguments, and the support system is very smooth. Love is stronger as the end result of it. We easily adjusted to what we actually have identified as the weak points of each other, and we invested more on our strengths. What's vital also is that you should be vocal in expressing your gratitude and appreciation of what he does best. It's a positive reinforcement that will nurture your relationship.

Don't steal some roles also. Respect the line and be supportive instead if he fails to do it. No one should be dominant in all aspects (I always remind myself on that). One must be the commander, and one must be the follower. And it switches depending on the given role. Even if you think it's not working, the support must be thrown at all times, and not by taking over the role. Many relationship cracks because one overtakes someone's role if they fail once. I guess that could be the reason why things are pretty much working for us.

To give you an idea on how we have identified our roles in our relationship, see a few below our distribution of roles...

• He cooks the food, I am the happy muncher
• I tickle him non-stop at bed, he takes all the laughter and the pain (haha)
• I do the clutter, he cleans and arrange our pad (daily)
• I drive, he is the passenger
• I do the hard work, he does the house work
• I am the giver of sweet tight cuddle, he is the enjoying recipient
• He eats one hash brown for breakfast, I eat two
• I am the hair stylist, he is the happy loyal customer
• I am the quality control, he is the master craftsman
• I get so many stress in life, he is the one who takes it all the way
• He is the boring, non-conversationalist type of guy, I am the opposite
• I have tons of sense of humor, he has tons of humor gas to use for laughing
• I use the dishes, he cleans the dishes
• I use more clothes than him, he washes all the clothes
• I am the master planner of our groceries, he is the master carrier of our grocery bags (haha)
• I have a strong emotions, he has the stronger faith

I know it may sound unfair to you but that's how we are. I told you, I'm a spoiled partner. And that's my role. He is the spoiler (do we have that actual term?). I'm his big baby boy or bondying sa tagalog. And he enjoys that. That's why he spoils me. That's why being away now from each other became so difficult for us to adjust to. Pareho kaming nasanay sa role nang isa 't isa. Because what we had back in the Philippines truly worked and helped us maintain and keep our relationship for that long.

With a clear and better understanding of roles, it's easier to make a relationship work. No lapses, no misses, everything is covered. And for me, communication is the key, matched with undying appreciation. It works. Believe me. Okay, I'm so sleepy now. I was driving the whole day and I only had a few hours of sleep. Time to recharge. Blogging resumes tomorrow. Enjoy your saturday night!!!

Photo Walk: Pattaya's Phra Tamnak Hill (Buddha Hill)

Vote For Cris

I'm calling all the humanoids (LOL) out there to vote for my good friend Cris Esmeria Bernardo. Utos Yan! Hehe. Just kidding. I know how to recognize what's good and great. And this girl is just way better than the average female singer. Ewan ko ba bakit hindi naging singer ito at nabigyan nang recording album. Sakit sa bangs nito eh, kung kumanta, parang wala nang bukas. Kung bumirit, palaging buwis lalamunan. Kaya let's help her to gain more likes sa TFCKat. Please click the link below...

TFCKat Semi Finals

Just like the page and then like her video. Just look for Crisadhel Bernardo. It's the second video on top, at the right side of the page. It's her rendition of Love on Top of Beyonce. Yan. Mga ganyan lang naman binabanatan niya. Tapos parang wala lang. Hehe. I remember Cris during her final interview sa previous company ko. Ako ang isa sa nag-interview sa kanya. Nung nalaman kong singer siya, wala na. She got me there. LOL. Just kidding. Kaya ayun, siya ang nagdala nang bandila nang kumpanya namin sa isang singing contest dati. Magaling kasi. Mabait pa ang asawa nitong si Mitch. Mga nakasama ko sa trabaho dati.

Kaya hindi ako nagbibiro. At di ako gagawa nang isang entry kung alam kong walang binatbat. At di ako mahilig mag-promote nang basta basta, alam niyo yan. Kaya, paki-LIKE na. Vote for Cris! It will only take a few minutes of your time. Haha. Hanggang August 31 lang ang botohan. Dali, may komisyon kasi ako pag nanalo siya. Haha. Just kidding. If you wanna see more of her renditions, just look for "mrspongsker" sa youtube, or just click that link, and you'll find more songs she did that you can enjoy. Thanks in advance!!!

Top 5 Entries

It's my 3rd month keeping this blog. So far, andoon pa din ang gana ko magsulat. Thank God! I have created 127 entries already since the day I started blogging again. Since then, I have tracked the traffic to see if my site is visited frequently. I just want to know if there are people reading what I'm writing. Haha. And the report encourages me. I sometimes also track which entry has the most views. To see what interests people or what time is the best to publish an entry. Here's my all time Top 5 entries:

Looks like the story of me and Jze invited a lot of viewers being on the 2nd spot, same goes to my birthday entry for my good friend here in Pattaya, Ray. And it seems like a lot got interested about the straight guy and a gay guy duo I wrote, which earned the 5th spot the night I published it. That fast! Jze has a lot of twitter followers kaya siguro dinumog ang entry na yun. Yung Food Discoveries Part I, na-publish kasi sa isang online site kaya dumami din ang views. You see, I'm not in to invading the blogosphere world. Sa ganyang stats, masaya na ako. Haha. Masaya na akong malamang may nagbabasa nang sinusulat ko at may bumibisita sa blog ko. LOL.

But thanks to Jze, Ray and Cholo for adding more viewers to my blog. Hehe.

Choose Philippines

I joined an online contest by Choose Philippines and this is my entry. The contest is about promoting Philippine as a country and its food or tradition. The prize is a trip to Palawan for two. In contests like this, I really don't expect to win. Di ako swerte sa mga ganyan. Gusto ko lang sumali and to contribute in promoting the beauty of our country. Since I have so many pictures, I had a hard time choosing one. I just thought of a picture that makes us unique from other countries. Yung sariling atin. So I remember Django, the carabao in Villa Escudero. And you have to put a tag saying "I choose Philippines because" and so I placed this tag:

If America has horse-riding, Dubai has camel-riding, and Thailand has elephant-riding, "I choose PHILIPPINES because we have CARABAO-riding!"

I think I will die promoting our country. Haha. I will forever shout "Choose Philippines!" to the world.

Intimacy WIthout Sex

Upon browsing through some blogs I follow, I got inspired to one article I read and thought of putting my zombie brain into writing about Intimacy. But this time, a question of "can people achieve intimacy without sex?". It's quite interesting to play your thoughts on this as many people nowadays cannot, really!. But honestly, there are a few who can and it's quite actually possible if you'll think about it. Aminin na lang natin na madami lang talagang maiinit at nagmamadali. Amen? LOL.

A lot of gay men nowadays are so desperate for intimacy at di na sila nakikinig sa mabuting anghel sa kanang balikat nila. Lagi dun sa kaliwa. Haha. After the initial connection, sugod na agad. Attack! Then natatapos na ang pinagpantasyahang relasyon sana. Bakit? Nawala na agad ang excitement kasi. Ang intimacy. Remember that Intimacy is built on connection through mutual experience or feeling. It takes time for these things to build. Okay, mutual experience doesn’t mean mutual masturbation ha. It means sharing yourselves with each other, finding common interests and connection.

Magbibigay ako nang example. Best friends. Many of them will be built on years of shared experiences, good and bad. It is the hardships tsaka yung support that brings them closer. Yung mga fun times tsaka walang hanggang tawanan. Minsan, may mga pagtatalo pa nga. Now I remember a friend, itago na lang natin sa pangalang, ay wag na, di ko na lang papangalanan, pero pag nabasa niya ito, either ngingiti na lang siya or makakatanggap na lang ako nang message sa Facebook. LOL. I'll use his experience as an example.

Hindi siya nakikipag-sex sa dine-date niyang guy until the third date. Kapag may na-meet siyang guy and he is genuinely interested, he tries not to get naked straight away. He tries to keep it (G) rated at least for a few dates. May ganun siyang konsepto, which I actually admire. That's what I'm saying. Don’t let sex be the focus of your connection. Once the orgasm is passed, it’s easy to lose interest. Believe me. Sexual objectification is a real problem for gay men and you cannot hope to achieve intimacy in your life with people in whom your only connection is sexual.

Unless na sex lang ang gusto mo, then wag nang pakinggan o basahin ang entry na ito. But if you're looking into something, like a relationship, then this might help you. A great way to connect is to find an interest that you both enjoy. Minsan makikita at malalaman mo yan kapag magkasama kayo by asking or by hearing his stories. By then, you will be able to share it together and enjoy each others company. Mutual interests are a great way to stir conversation which is an essential part of connecting with somebody.

Pero alam ako din naman na lahat eh natatakot masaktan. But do understand that to achieve intimacy with a person, meron dapat level of vulnerability that we open ourselves up to. Sharing our feelings is part of the story, and so is allowing ourselves to be open to our feelings and mindful of the other person. Of course, you cannot be intimate with a brick wall, for a deeper relationship we must be prepared to put ourselves out there. Ganun talaga. It's an investment. Parang business lang yan, you cannot expect that it will gain revenue in an instant. May growing pains din yan.

With a few observations based from the people I have interacted with, and stories I've heard, I realized that there are many things that prevent people from achieving intimacy. But recognizing these things will actually help you to counter them when they pop up and knowing why you are resisting intimacy will give you a deeper insight in to yourself and allow you to work on these fears. There's fear of abandonment, rejection, being neglected, loss of control, exposure, and failure.

Some are threatened by loss of personal freedom. Yung iba because of low-esteem or sometime, yung tinatawag na trust issue. Meron din about having difficulty in expressing one's emotions or feelings. You see, a lot of reasons out there but in order to achieve what you want to achieve, you have to face it. You have to conquer it. Believe that it is possible to achieve intimacy without getting physical and the rewards of a relationship built this way are far greater than any single orgasm. Di pa ba sapat ako as an example, and my relationship with hubbee? LOL.

Sex brings us physically close but it is the touching of minds that makes that connection satisfying. Don’t be afraid to say “lets get to know each other first”. The rewards will be worth it.

A Straight Guy & Gay Guy Duo

A post from my Facebook account last weekend:

"Saturday Night Out with Cholo at Walking Street. A straight guy & a gay guy duo. I told you, that combo can still work. Then we met our filipino friends na singers, hopped in to 3 different bars at yun, nung nagsama-sama na, boom na. Sumabog na ang saya at ligaya. LOL. Then breakfast at our place. It's 6:25 am now. Time for me to Zzzzzz..."

It was a fun night at Walking Street together with some filipino friends. It was a good time also to get to know more Cholo as a person. Cholo is the bestfriend of Nano and youngest brother ni Chem. Mabait si Cholo. Siya na ang kadikit ni Nano eversince he got here in Pattaya. Kaya para na silang kambal tuko. May pasok kasi si Nano the next day kaya ako na lang ang niyaya sa Walking Street. Ininvite kasi siya ni Ate Connie sa Candy Shop. Kaso pagdating namin dun, tapos na ang set ni ate. Saludo talaga ako sa mga straight guys who do not give a shit kung bading ang kasama nila. I'm a hater of homophobic guys kasi. Yung feeling na akala mo, you will take advantage of them. Huh! Good thing hindi ganun ang mga straight guys dito. Buti na lang!

I also met a new good friend, si ClauDee. The cool girl with a braided hair. Isang singer din pero paalis na siya sa Malaysia, doon kasi ang kontrata niya. Last night out na niya. Masaya kasama. After nang isang beer sa Candy Shop, pumunta naman kami sa Lucifer para panoorin si Ate Janice. Maya maya, nag-aya na sila Cholo pumunta nang Lima Lima para panoorin naman si Ray. Doon na kami tumambay buong magdamag. Saya lang. Sayaw sayaw, tawanan, chill chill. Pinainom ako ni Ray nang Apple Martini, yun na ang tumira sa akin that night. Nahilo na ako. Hehe.

Thanks guys for a great night! I had fun. Sa uulitin!!!

Photo Walk: Pattaya's Ripley's Believe It Or Not